The things you find

At beginning of the week I found some old drawings and paintings that I did at College. I pulled them out and was amazed at how clearly I remembered each one and how I was feeling at the time. I looked at them and felt this surge in my gut and it made me absolutely sure that this is now the right path for me. It's amazing that at the time I drew some of these I was completely lost with it all. I knew it was what I wanted to do but I wasn't engaging with it in the right way and I was all over place. I thought being young it would change but it never really did. Flitting about with jobs and subjects and relationships to fill the void and hole just in the end made me more confused than ever. I never enjoyed being taught around the time of my A Levels and this worried me. Its taken another 11 years to know why. I was bogged down with teachers and tired subjects/worrying about grades and completely lost sight of why I was doing it all. I feel like I can breathe again in the last few months - I feel like Ive completely shifted. I feel excited at the moment because if its like this now and its only been 4 months since Ive woken up, things can only get better surely? Lets not jinx this! But Im hoping so.

Here are a few things I've picked out:
A Level work:







GCSE work:

Bed drawing

I'm feeling a little under the weather today BUT I have managed finish off these Pelicans which I initially had in mind to do in an animated small card form for the Ripple blog - however it turned out to be A4 in my sketchbook and a nice distraction from my headache. My back is killing me right now - I should probably sit at a table to do this stuff:




Apart from my back being ruined, it was nice to sit on the bed a doodle. I had a much more unproductive day yesterday before meeting a friend and only half finishing a sketch of the Library Clocktower, due to cold fingers and constant distractions. I would still like to get to the point where I can draw anywhere but I seem to need the right conditions. The REAL condition is probably just shutting down the mind and focusing on the page, but that's a little difficult with a drill and builders a few feet away! Gahh. Other news is, the drawing IS back again (thankgod) and I have got rid of the rubbish in my life. I am chucking out that trash and starting again. A nice little clean slate.

Coming back

Sunday morning consisted of me bolting out of bed and deciding that I needed to paint and draw. It's been a few weeks and I've just not felt like it, life situations clouded my head too much. I grabbed my watercolours that I havent used yet and drew a delicate teapot that we have sitting on the shelf:



I then strolled outside and saw these amazing tomatoes that had just been picked:



I did a quick watercolour and ink, its not how I wanted it to originally come out, but heck its OKish:



Other than that Im glad my head has come back round. It's nice to be filled with the buzz again, I started thinking about all the things I can do in the future like commissions but also just drawings for others and for myself. I also met my brothers new kitten smudge today:



I think Smudge will have to be drawn, I couldn't stop following him around and picking him up much to his irritation.....

I've missed this. It's nice to come back.